ellenstebbins.com

If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. Thanks for visiting!

www.thelowcountrybusinessnetwork.com

Is it raining in your life right now?

In these tough economic times, it’s hard to look around us and be grateful and thankful for what you have been blessed with. But it’s that gratitude that will enrich and bless your life. Your attitude toward life defines not only who you are, but the quality of life you will have. What is your attitude? Are you grateful or are you a complainer?  Each season of your life will bring it’s own unique trials and blessings. Give thanks for there is a lesson to be learned!!!

Watch this short movie!

Learning to Dance In The Rain

I want to start this post out with two of my favorite quotes….

“Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with great talent. Genius will not. Un-rewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not. The world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence, determination and love are omnipotent.” ~ Calvin Coolidge

“Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the hard work you already did.” ~Newt Gingrich

Aren’t these quotes so true? And yet so many times, we give up way too soon. We give up on our friends, our marriages, our kids and our businesses. We lose sight of what is close to our heart and what we have been working so hard for. Unfortunately, perseverance is a quality that a lot of people lack.

How many times have you failed? How many times have you wanted to give up? How many times have you picked yourself up from failure, brushed yourself off and continued to move forward? This is what really matters. In my experience, when we are tired and want to throw in the towel, we are right around the corner from a massive reward.

Check out this video on Derek Redmond. This IS true perseverance!

People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are.  I don’t believe in circumstances.  The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and, if they can’t find them, make them.  ~G.B. Shaw, Mrs. Warren’s Profession, 1893

Keep moving forward my friends! Don’t let anything stop you!

I want to share with you one of the most uncomfortable but most unbelievable personal growth exercises that I have ever done!

I realized through some personal/business coaching that I am doing, that I need to understand how other people perceive me. In order to do this, I had to go WAY out of my comfort zone!

Here’s what I did. I had to interview a number of people in different areas: 2 personal, 2 business and 2 relational. I ended up having so much fun with this that I called 14 people!

I asked them questions like:
• Are we able to connect on a deeper level? Do you feel that I include you in my life? Do I let you in? If I don’t let you in, what makes you feel that way?
• What are the things that work about me in business? What doesn’t work about me?
• How do I make you feel in our interactions?
• What are the things that would keep you from asking me out or being in a relationship with me?

The feedback I received was tremendous and most people were happy to share openly with me. And it’s extremely important for you to remember not to become defensive or upset when someone tell you something that you don’t like! Generally, we need to take note of these things and go to work on ourselves!

I highly recommend that everyone do this! This is one of the best things you can do for yourself and will help you move forward with your life.

Wow, what I learned was amazing! I would encourage you to go for it and do the same.

We are all leaders in some aspect of our lives. We are leaders in our businesses, we are leaders in our homes, we are leaders in our personal relationships and we are leaders in our community. What being a leader means to me is making people better by being in my presence.

Leadership doesn’t require a title. Leadership only requires that you have your head and your heart in the game for the betterment of others.

What are the key ingredients of a leader?

• Integrity – leaders have a moral compass that guides them

• Vision – leaders have the ability to see the endless opportunities that lie ahead of them

• Inspiration – leaders coach by encouraging, empowering, and giving affirmation to those  around them

• Competence – leaders master the fundamentals, they have studied their craft and have the ability to get the job done

• Courage – leaders have the courage to accomplish their dreams, they are not afraid of failing, dusting themselves off and moving forward

• Perseverance – leaders anticipate roadblocks and potholes and they know how to hang in there

• Selflessness – leaders know that it’s not about what’s convenient, they are willing to make sacrifices. They make sure everyone else on the team gets the credit. They know it’s not about them

Your team needs 4 things from you as their leader:
1) You have to protect their vision. There are way too many distractions in today’s world. Helping a team member continue to see the vision of where they are going is critical.
2) You have to increase their confidence in themselves and the industry. This comes with daily encouragement.
3) You have to develop their competence and skills. Providing your team with the resources they need to develop the skill set necessary to grow in their industry.
4) You have to ground them in reality. Too many people expect too much on the front end and not enough on the back end. It takes time to lay the foundation to build a strong business. Expectations + Executions = Earnings. Frustration is the gap between what you are expecting and what you are experiencing. How do you close the gap? Expectations have to be in line with reality.

Your team will only grow as fast as you do. Find out what’s holding you back and address it.

And sometimes, you just have to be…………..a lone nut!

Have you created “space” in your life for the things that are important to you?

You may be asking yourself what I mean by space.  Two of the many definitions of space in the dictionary are “an area reserved for some particular purpose” and “the unlimited expanse in which everything is located”.

Space and time are two completely different things. When you have created the space for someone or something in your life, then you will make the time necessary for that person/thing. Make sense?

I will give you a couple of very simple examples.

From a personal standpoint, let’s say that you are single but would like to engage in a relationship. Have you created “space” for the person in your life? In other words, have you created room for them? You have work, friends, kids, etc, so where will time for love fit in? If you truly want a relationship, then you have to create space for that special person. And when you create the space, the time for that person will come naturally.

From a financial standpoint, let’s say that you are stuck on a project or can’t figure out how to deal with the effects of the economy. Have you created the “space” in your mind to see all and hear all so that you can see all the opportunities that are around you?  Create the open space in your mind. And when you do, so many new, unlimited possibilities will appear. They were there all the time, but you couldn’t see them because you were full.

It’s time to interrupt your life! And when you create space in the areas of life that are important to you, you can produce unprecedented results without sacrifice.

Ask yourself this question – What’s my attitude? Am I a winner or am I a whiner? Is my cup half-full or half-empty?

People see attitude as whether someone is “positive” or “negative”. Yes, having a “positive” attitude is great! People want to be with people that are enjoyable to be around. But I want to challenge you to look deeper than that.

What is YOUR attitude towards: Life? Money? Health? Friends? Love? Your Children? Business? Going out of your comfort zone?

You may have a negative attitude in some areas of your life and not even realize it. As I am living my life, I am always consciously aware of my attitudes. I am always open to seeing where I have become closed off. Have I become angry or resentful about something? How am I treating my children? Are the relationships in my life flourishing? Have I created “space” for the people and things that are important to me? When I see something that I don’t like, I have a complete attitude check and tune up.

Are you willing to make the necessary attitude adjustments?

Remember that a good attitude will not guarantee your success but a bad attitude will guarantee your failure. Surround yourself with positive people that get it. People who aren’t afraid to cannonball into life!

I would love to hear your comments below!

Ellen

These photos were taken by my friend and photographer, Diana Deaver…………….

An unwaivering love for beauty in its many forms and faces is what defines Diana Deaver’s quest into photography. With a background in fashion and beauty photography Diana Deaver has embraced her passion and raised it to the level of a profession. With numerous ventures into other visual arts like drawing and painting, Diana Deaver is constantly involved in the art community in Charleston. Several art and photography shows, presence in publications such as The Charleston Magazine, Charleston Weddings, The Post and Courier and the support of several local artistic events such as Pecha Kucha and Charleston Fashion Week are just a few of Diana’s artistic pursuits. She is currently teaching at The Charleston Center for Photography while constantly enhancing her own knowledge.
“We are all students, we are all teaching”.

Your Professional Head-shot

Your professional head-shot is very important for the web first impression, your work portfolio, your book that is being published or as part of a business group. Recently I have had the pleasure of working with many professionals who wanted to update and improve their website and hired me to help with the pictures. I have put together a list of questions and answers about what your photo-shoot should be like:

What should I wear at the photo-shoot? Wear simple colors that compliment your skin. Avoid large patters or complicated fabrics that can distract the viewer. Some people ask me whether they should wear a suit or a shirt…the answer is always: whatever you usually wear when you meet your clients…something that you love, that makes you feel confident and prepared for a business meeting.

Should I be smiling or be serious? It depends on the type of business you are in and how you want your clients to perceive you. I encourage my clients to be themselves in front of the camera, and during the photo-shoot I ask them questions and try to get them to relax and be pleasantly engaged. We take a lot of pictures and pick the best together. Ultimately when you post your picture and biography you want your future clients to find out who you are, what you stand for and how you are going to treat them. If you smile a lot then your head-shot should reflect that. It should be a good representation for the person that is going to shake their hand when they walk into your office.

Should I have my hair and make-up professionally done? This is a delicate matter because the camera usually diminishes make-up by 40%. If you wear make-up on a regular basis then you should have it done a bit more intensely than usual for the photo-shoot. Since I was trained to do make-up for the camera a lot of my clients choose to hire me to take care of that. And for the hair I think that having it freshly washed and styled (even at your favorite salon that usually cuts your hair) goes very far in giving you that extra bit of confidence to be in front of the camera. After all, your picture should ideally be taken in a good hair day

Should I take the picture in a studio, outdoors or in my office?

The type of business you are in makes a difference in how I would answer this question. Natural light is very complimenting to skin tones and when used right it can reveal your best facial features. I also think a head-shot taken outdoor can portray you as friendly and approachable. A studio head-shot can appear very formal but that might be exactly what you’re looking for especially if you are a beauty product supplier for instance. You should not have your head-shot taken at your office unless you are looking for a biographical portrait- where you are being portrait in your work environment. I recommend a biographical portrait when it is important to you to present your product, your brand or the location in which you work.

Ultimately, keep in mind that your head-shot is supposed to encourage anyone to contact you, do business with you. It is supposed to be inviting and friendly.

I had the pleasure of photographing the stunning Ellen Stebbins recently! What a beautiful lady inside and out)!

To find out more about her and her beautiful business visit:http://ellenstebbins.com/

To learn more about Diana Deaver, please visit her site at www.dianadeaver.com and www.dianadeaverweddings.com. I highly recommend her work!!!! She is a pleasure to work with!

Timeless Wisdom……….

http://www.greatquotesmovie.com/

Did you know that where you are today is a reflection of your daily habits? Every move you make either moves you closer to your life’s ultimate design or it moves you away from your life’s ultimate design.

This is where setting goals comes into play.

It’s funny because for a number of years, I thought I was creating awesome goals but after going through Life Coach training, I realized that all I was creating was a “to do” list. And the more I “accomplished”, the more I thought I was progressing in the direction of my goals. I couldn’t have been more wrong!

In this post I want to provide you with the basics of setting clearly defined goals that move you toward the life you have designed for yourself.

Your Goals Should Be SMART
Specific – determine exactly what you want
Measurable – they move you forward
Attainable – achievable but make you stretch
Realistic – don’t set yourself up for failure
Timely – date specific

You Should Set
Short-term goals(daily and weekly)
Mid-term goals(monthly and quarterly)
Long-term goals(1, 2, 5 years)

How to Set Goals
Ultimately, you want to set a total of 3 big goals each week. And each of these goals will have at least 3 actions steps. When you do this consistently week after week, you will move yourself forward in ways you can’t imagine.
Goal: What is the ultimate outcome

Obstacle: What is stopping you

Date: Set the date you want to achieve this goal

Action Step 1: What 1st step can you take to overcome the obstacle and achieve your goal.
Action Step 2: What 2nd step can you take to overcome the obstacle and achieve your goal.
Action Step 3: What 3rd step can you take to overcome the obstacle and achieve your goal.

When you evaluate your goals each week, you should ask yourself the following questions:
1) Is there anything I’d like to improve or do better?
2) Is there anything I learned that can help me reach any of my goals?
3) What went well this past week?
4) What made me happiest?
5) Did anything during the week make me unhappy or didn’t go as well for me as I had hoped?

Some final tips on goal setting:

• Be clear on goals
• Organize into an action plan.
• Take action.
• Resolve to do something every day to move your business forward.
• Plan every day.
• Apply 80/20 rule to everything.

And remember that at the heart of all this is a dream – the WHY that will keep you going. Are you willing to pay the price for success? Nothing great comes for free. Desire, discipline and drive has to come from within.

You need to determine what you want, decide what you are willing to sacrifice/reschedule, associate with people that will help you get what you want , have a plan of action and WORK the plan.

Remember that small goals achieved repeatedly add up to big dreams fulfilled. Take the time to clearly define where you are going in your journey. Where will YOU be this time next year?
Remember to leave your comments and share with others!

Ellen